Category Archives: Anger


Wushu doggie day care










This is Wushu. She is 3 years old. I have known her since she was a small young pup. She’s my friend.

She says, “I know that you are always called in when I am trouble but I don’t feel like I am trouble this time. I feel like Mickey (Dog of Wushu’s person’s boyfriend) is really not wanting me around. I feel like he feels like no one should get close to his dad, even my mom. I say this is no problem let it be and

he says, “This is a problem. I like my alone time.”

… I go and hide because I don’t like myself when I am have Mickey around. I don’t like the feelings I have in my body. I have fear and I have an intense feeling to be mad, and I am not sure how to make it better.

*After the conflict resolution Wushu says,

“I would like to tell my mom that I really love her and I am really happy with our life together. I feel good about that. I feel like mom makes me smart. I hope to become friends with Mickey cause he is right enemies are not fun. They make you sick to your stomach.”


Wushu person writes:  Laura, thank you again for your help. Before we could do anything after our conversation, there was an immediate, positive shift between Mickey and Wushu’s interactions. Their tolerance of each other continues to improve (gradually…as strong personalities sure need baby steps!), but we’re working on it. We shared burgers per Mickey’s request, go to new places, and this past weekend both of them did a great job at the beach (per Wushu’s request)!

Wushu and Mickey with their person Jen.

Wushu and Mickey with their person Jen.

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Kayla 7 month old cat

When Kayla was asked why her former people brought her to the shelter she responded,

“Those people gave me up ’cause I kept pooping on their bed. I did it ’cause they were gross and they never cleaned my litter box. I was happier to get rid of them then them get rid of me. I can poop when ever I want, did you know that? I even tried to poop on my person’s lap. Okay, I am so much happier here; It was a good decision of mine.”


Comments from facebook:


  • Amy My cat never goes in her box, it is perfectly clean but she only goes outside or in the living room when she has a bone to pick with me.

  • Laura Stinchfield  Amy that could be true about having an issue with you.




  •  slippery poops – digestive issue they can not always hold it. It is not diarrhea just all of a sudden stomach cramping and then they have to go.

  • Clay litter is too dusty and it hurts their eyes and their nose,

  • crystals in the litter burn their feet,

  • top on litter box traps smell too much,

  • litter made for “multiple cat” has too strong of an odor.

  • Bladder, hips, or knees are hurting so dont want to lift their leg into the box,

  • litter too deep for older cats and it hurts body to support themselves when they go,

  • clay litter or clumping litter sticks to their feet or fur and when they groom it swells in their stomach.

  • of course bladder / kidney infection

  • physical l problems often caused by food that have a lot of grain and or sugar. fancy feast, nine lives… any supermarket brands.

  • any more…. those are the main ones

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Kayla answers why she can be aggressive, “I don’t like a lot of people near me cause sometimes what they smell like and what they look like are confusing.”

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Sadie & Boo

Sadie & Boo


Sadie and Boo are 7 years old.  We asked if they are fighting for real or play fighting. Here is what they answer and say about their relationship:


Sadie says,

“I am really fighting. He has me really annoyed. Sometimes I bat him on the head for play and sometimes I bat him because he has hit me too hard or kicked at me too hard to has told me that I am not smart and we all know that I am smarter than he is. Sorry Boo. I love you but I am more intelligent.”


Boo says,

“I am always playing. I never fight for real and it is true Sadie is smarter than me but it is ok I am more loving. I have more of softness in me. She is more hard core. She is like a fiery bug that keeps trying to get out the window.”

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Kochi is 2 years-old.  He says,

“Sometimes I am aggressive to other dogs because I think that they are bad. I think that they have bad ideas and I really have the best ideas in the park.”


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BobKitty says, “I will tell you something about my moms bad news. Its not bad news, it just words. Words don’t have to mean anything. You can choose to not hear them. “ (His Mom/person had just found out that she couldn’t have a baby)

Bobkitty was picking fights with Boots another cat in the house, so I asked why.

“Boots didn’t want me to be here and I have never forgiven her for that. If Boots becomes my friend where do i put all the toughness I have? Maybe I could play? I don’t like to hunt as much as I used to. But, if there are people who can hear animals then I must be able to change and be nicer to Boots. I will try. “

From Boots & BobKitty’s person! No fights since we talked in November! Thank you Laura!

Great job Boots, BobKitty and Milissa!

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May 2010 phone session:
Angel says, “If I become a master of myself will other dogs and people notice? Sometimes I get confused on what is good behavior and what is behavior I have to do. When I fight sometimes I think that is behavior I have to do. I am confused a lot of the time and when that happens I either play or not think anymore. I feel like there is too much to understand. Dad thinks its cool to have us but then he thinks we are a nuisance. Dad should know that if we didn’t have this home we would be living in terrible places. Mom has saved us.”

Nov. 2010 phone session:
Angel says, “I have learned that my eyes can start a fight. If I look too long at someone I can get mad. So I have been trying not to look so much. I like the feeling of being good rather than the feeling of being aggressive. Deep down I’m really very friendly.”

Notes from Angels person:  (Since her first session with Laura back in Feb. 2010, Angel has made enormous progress, and while that took work on her part and ours, the insight Laura was able to provide after listening to all our dogs was invaluable and increased their communication and cooperation with each other. Now the other dogs help Angel instead of avoiding her and all are markedly more happy and relaxed. Truly, this is priceless!)

I am so proud of the way Angel has been thinking about her behavior and changing.  It is important to believe that our animals can change and explain to them step by step how they can change.

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Sometimes when I tell the dogs that they must help their friends be conscious of their behavior they take their job very seriously.

Ruby says about her dog friend Angel, “The reason Angel thinks I am not be friendly is because I keep telling her how she can do things differently. I am telling her come here or go over there. I just have to watch Angel so she doesn’t get herself into trouble. I try and help her. I like to always try to be the best I can be.”

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Piglet says, “I find it hard to concentrate for long periods of time. Since I talked to you last I have become a better thinker. We all have and I think about who I am and I think about who I want to be and I noticed there is a big chunk out of my interactions with the other dogs when I forget to think. It worries me. When you watch other dogs talk to one another you realize a lot of fights happen from misunderstandings. If that is true with people too, people should watch other people to learn.
Mom, thank you. Mom, thank you. I know mom wants to keep me and I feel really blessed she has such a good home for me.”

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Tibbi On Her Barking


“When I get aggressive I go into a world that I only know barking noise.  I loose my smartness.  My smartness gets thrown away and then it takes me a long time to get it back again.”

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